This Is Me!
How is it that a person who just met you a few hours ago can already know you?
Now I don’t mean know you/know you, but I mean that they have categorized you into a particular bucket such that when you talk about yourself more it isn’t a surprise to them. That seems to be happening to me more and more these past few years. I don’t observe this as coincidence, but rather it’s more likely that I am shielding my true self less, even in first impression situations.
In coming weeks, I will break down my Top 5 CliftonStrengths and how I leverage them in my day-to-day life. For today, I’ll discuss my Significance (#3) and Command (#6) CliftonStrengths and how they parallel my Enneagram Type 8 (The Powerful). (NOTE: See the very bottom of this post for links to these assessments.)
In my past (before I was given this terminology,) I didn’t recognize these as unique to me. The more I learned about them and claimed them as my own, the more I became aware of how truly embedded that they are in my wiring.
For instance, I can remember a Louisiana summer when I was about 9 or 10 years old. It was a rainy afternoon and Mom wanted us “out from under her feet.” This was before cable or satellite reached our home. We lived in the country and were in an entertainment desert of sorts. There wasn’t much to do except use our imaginations to create a game.
I am the first-born child and grandchild on both sides, so I had a team that I could delegate to already pre-determined. That day, the game that I developed was a non-profit in which I was the President. I then directed my cousin to be Secretary and assigned my brother as Treasurer. We had meeting minutes and everything. Yes; I had a vision AND was completely at ease delegating even then!
I hadn’t recalled that memory until earlier this year when I was hosting a client’s firm-wide retreat. I see how these motivations are paralleled in my life today.
As an example, it translates to my enthusiasm with volunteering in the community (Significance) but invariably, I work to get on the Board and then become Chairperson of the organization (Command). I’m not dictatorial, but I do provide compelling justification and can influence decisions with passion and energy.
These strengths are also reflected in the way that I host parties personally for fun. It’s not a control issue as much as I want to be remembered as offering our friends and family the best experience possible. I prep for weeks in cooking and decorating to ensure that everything is just right. It’s my legacy.
That’s why I have even given thought to my funeral. To me, this is not morbid; I know that I will be here for a long time. (My husband jokes: “You will outlive us all!”) It’s more about wanting to ensure that I don’t forget something that will better serve as a reflection of me. From my point of view, it’s not control; it’s good planning! HA!
The dark side is that I have been called bossy, especially by my three younger siblings. At times, I was embarrassed about my strengths and how dominant they are.
I used to try to mask them to fit in and be less overpowering. I would compare myself to my kind, Emergency Room RN sister who everyone loves because she is a walking, caring and compassion heart, exposed for all to see. Her old soul is like Mother Earth.
I used to wonder how two people who grew up in the house could be so different. I now know that my take charge personality is hard-wired in my DNA. I see my place in this world and that I serve in a different, yet still valuable way. I also realize that I need to embrace my differences and really dig in to identify and access them more readily. Only then can they become true strengths that work as my superpowers.
As I reflect, they are the drivers that have propelled me throughout my life to where I am today. I realize how I am embracing them more so that my shield is down, and I show up as my true self, even in first impression situations.
Do you own who you are and where your strengths zone is? Are you sometimes misunderstood because of it? If you’d like to take the CliftonStrengths Assessment and delve deeper, then contact me at dlandry@authentizity.com.
For more information about the assessments, visit:
Gallup CliftonStrengths Finder: https://www.gallup.com/cliftonstrengths/en/252137/home.aspx
Enneagram Institute: https://www.enneagraminstitute.com/
